Fanfiction: And I Love Her

"I love you with every fibre of my being. It was the thought of you that has kept me going the past few months, stopped me from going mad ... and I thought I could deal with hurting you as long as the ends justified the means but I can't. Not anymore. Nothing has changed and I'm still going to stay away from you ... but you need to know, Dora, you need to. Until the day I die and even thereafter, however long or short a time it may be from now until then, I will love you completely. And one day you're going to find someone right for you and you're going to marry them. And you're going to be able to have children with them, because that's the life you deserve, Dora. And it's everything I can't give you. I will still love you, even then. I will content myself with knowing you are happy, even if it kills me every single day."There were tears in his eyes now as he stepped even closer to her, resting his forehead against her own. She could feel her chest heaving, though she had not registered beginning to cry. She must have though, her face smeared with tears to match his own, violent sobs raking through her entire body with such force that it was his arm snaking around her waist that prevented her from collapsing to the floor like she had during the summer.
"But the truth is," he continued, his voice little more than a whisper, hot breath ghosting across her face. He sounded broken, " ... the truth is sometimes I think you and I might be meant for each other. And that scares me."

---

"You're young -"
"And I could die tomorrow, Remus. We both could. Please. Stop worrying about destroying me. This is destroying me. This."
"You said once," he mumbled, both hands now on the back of her neck, "That you didn't want to die until you'd done everything you wanted to do. Gotten married, had a child. None of that is an option with me ... I'd just be holding you back."
"A year ago! Maybe my priorities have changed! And besides -"
He sighed, "Besides nothing. Give it a while and you'll be over me. In twenty years time you won't remember me at all, I'll just be a man you were once infatuated with. Love always finds the people who are most deserving and there's someone out there for you, your own age ... and whole."
"And you?" the sobs were coming thick and fast now, and she did little to restrain them.
"I was never deserving." he whispered, his voice barely audible, "That's why I had the misfortune to fall in love with someone too good for myself."
"Why do you refuse to accept that I love you?" she asked, doing nothing at all to disguise the break in her voice, "You are older than me, yes. Poor? Probably. Dangerous? No. But you're still perfect for me, regardless, for the simple fact that I am in love with you. What happens if you are the person I was supposed to spend the rest of my life with? What then?"
"I don't believe it," he answered simply, voice thick with tears, "Fate wouldn't be that cruel to you."

Source: And I Love Her, Chapter 10: On Beasts and Barstools